Thursday, 15 July 2010


Well, second meet really, but first with more than three people.

In the gorgeous surroundings of Brighton’s Marwood Eighties room – oddly appropriate – my new found actors read through the lines I’ve been sweating over for a couple of years now. The second part isn’t quite finished – Alex and I wrote only the first episode, which I’ve converted into the first part; so the final, deeply moving climax (definitely the right word) of The Disco, is still missing so far.


Obviously, any first read-through is a nightmare and I optioned not to let my actors, one of whom I’d never even met, have any information about the play in which they’d agreed to be in. So that got them nervous.

Didn’t matter. They read it great and I did feel smug how much everyone was laughing at the gags. Difficult to gauge the success of the structure but I never felt there were too many saggy moments.

After the read-through I had to ask if they were up for it. All – Kat, Tom, Dick and Terry (loving how 70s those names sound together) – gave me a thumbs up. No, not that kind of thumbs-up, stop it. My Joan Collins – the lovely Sarah who wasn’t there – has already given her blessing, so we are a company!


I explained all we need now is money, a venue, loads of really glittery Disco costumes, a set, a composer, disco songs, dancers, a house band and an amazing DJ to play the specially written guest narrator character DJ Daddy Cool. Oh and a band willing to hang around the whole show to play one song at the end.

No one seemed to think these deficiencies presented a real threat to the existence of the Disco, so who am I to contradict them.

Job done, we retired to one of Brighton’s hostelries so I could get to know these people. They turned out to be lovely. Then realised they all had proper jobs and had to get up in the morning. So THAT’s what you do to get money. Ah.

Can’t wait for the next meeting. Very excited today – hence this blog. And maybe next time we’ll have the whole cast…and even the whole script!

So if you’re reading this, please come and see my show.

Together they are THE DISCO

Well, we’re underway. I have for some months been working on a project I intend to invest a lot of energy and time bringing into being. The ambition is simple: to provide the ultimate good night out.

I don’t want to use the word Theatre. I really don’t want to use the word Theatre. Because you’re gonna ask how it is possible for the phrase ‘ultimate good night out’ be placed in the same sentence as the word ‘theatre’ without the necessary use of a third phrase: ‘The opposite of the…’being placed at the front of that initial phrase? (Keep up)


And if any of you reading believe otherwise, ponder this truism: how is it when you go to the cinema, no matter how mediocre the movie, you anticipate at least some moments of excitement, thrills, fulfilment? Whereas, I dare anyone to deny they trudge into the first act of any theatrical piece hoping it isn’t going to last too long, be too slow, that the main actress’s obligatory abortion speech doesn’t involve too much crying…
In other words, you expect cinema to be good until it isn’t, and dread theatre to be bad until it isn’t.

Enough of that. Let’s talk about me.

My new script THE DISCO had its second read-through last night. All but one of the cast were present. Not only present but wonderful. I outlined the master-plan (to make this the ultimate good night out, remember) and we proceeded from there.


What is THE DISCO? Well, it’s based on TV idea by myself and Mr Alex Kirk. We had some good feedback from the BBC but not enough to pursue.

Something about the idea wouldn’t die, so I’ve rewritten the Disco for the stage.

The Disco’s starting point is the wonderful 1970s British movie ‘The Stud’. Yes, the one with Joan Collins. If you’ve not seen it, beware. Is it genius or is it shit? It’s shit. No, it’s genius. No, it’s shit. It’s shit genius.

I’m not going to go into too much detail but think a sleazy Mamma Mia – with spangly boob-tubes, Boney M and Findus Crispy Pancakes. I’ll write another time about what happens and that. This blog is going to be about the process of getting The Disco – comedy, music, costumes – on its feet and becoming, yes, the Ultimate Good Night Out.

More to follow. Deal with it.